25 Amateur Hour
The good thing about not having much art formal training is that everything I do is a discovery.
Growing up, I got the message that if something doesn’t come to you quickly, if you are not “naturally” good at, it’s not for you, and you should step aside and let those who are good at it, do it.
We live in a culture where we expect things to come easily to us. Two or three tries and if we expect mastery.
As an adult I have tried to learn a second language, though I am not a particularly good language student.
If speaking your first language comes easily to you, you tend not to pay as much attention to how you do it. You don’t have to think about it.
I am not naturally good at learning languages. I do not draw straight lines easily either.
When you do something that you don’t know how to do, something that frustrates you, and at time, breaks your heart, you are more aware of the skills involved. And when you do succeed in learning something new, you tend to appreciate it more because of the effort it took to learn it.
Learning a second language, learning how to draw or paint, perhaps learning anything you learn there are levels of competence. There is no point at which you are done, only the place where you decide to stop learning.
You develop a fascination with the language itself, because nothing about it come to you without effort, without mistakes. When you do learn something you didn’t know, there’s a sense of celebration.
You’re much more self conscious about about how you do what you do.
If you can get over the idea of correctness, the idea that there’s that there’s one way to speak a language, or paint a painting, you learn not only new skills. You learn to notice and celebrate small incremental achievements, and also to see the humor and the beauty in your mistakes.